I'm yours You're mine
by TheLiineGirl
Summary: "... Just you and me. 'Cause you know that Natie? You are mine. And i'm yours." Serena and Nate pre-pilot! Two-Shot.
1. Serena's pov

**A/N Serena and Nate two-shot. First written on Fanpop. changed it a little. Serena's POV.**

"Happy Birthday princess" Lily hugged her daughter. "Four years. What an age?"

Serena smiled. "Presents!"

Lily laughed and gave Serena a small present. Serena looked at it. She opened it carefully. Lily looked at her, she never opens presents carefully.

"If you go downstairs i think you'll find a bigger present, if that's what you want." Serena jumped out of bed and ran downstairs. When she first came down, there was nothing. She was about to scream for her mom when a boy came out of the kitchen.

"Natiiiie!" Serena ran to him, hugged him so hard that he could hardly breathe.

He looked at her. "You know what? I'm going to live here until my parents get home!" Serena screamed of happiness.

She kissed him on his nose and then she took his hand. "You going to sleep in my room, and then it's going be like we are married!"

Nate looked at her. "Are you going to marry me?"

Serena smiled. "Yes Natie!" Nate blushed and hugged her.

* * *

><p>"He was so sweet. He opened the doors for me. He paid everything. He said i look pretty in the dress and i just know he's the one!" Serena knew Blair was happy. She had just been on her first date with Nate. Their first real date. Serena had been on the phone with her in over 3 hours. She knew every little detail of their date. She knew it so well, she actually though she had been on the date herself.<p>

"B calm down. It's not like he ask you to marry him." Serena knew it was going to hurt Blair. But she was hurt too. She always though Nate was hers. Not Blair's. That was what he always had told her.

"Not yet! But don't you see it S? I can marry Nate and then you can marry Chuck. We can be the four of us forever. We won't need anyone else!"Blair seemed happy of her little thought.

Serena hated Blair's little thought. "There is no way i'm going to marry Chuck! You can do that!" She snapped.

* * *

><p>She was bored. There was only one thing she was wanted to do. And only with one person. But she couldn't. Or could she? Blair didn't tell her not to. She was just so happy.<p>

Serena picked up her phone and pressed 1. "It's Nate. Hallo? Anyone there?" Her finger was on the red phone, she wanted to press to badly, because of Blair. But she couldn't because of herself.

"I'm coming over S." He said without her saying pressed on the red phone. He was coming. And she was happy about it.

**xxx**

"Did you know i love your laugh?" He said it, just there, in the middle of the movie. She blushed. She never blushed.

"No i didn't." She said. She breathed deeply: "Did you know i love everything about you?" She looked at him. He just looked back expecting her to say something. So she continued "Did you know i just wished this moment would stay forever?" From one moment to the other she started crying. "I just want to be with you forever. No Blair. No Mom and Dad. No school. No problems at all. Just you and me. Because you know that Natie? You are mine. And i'm yours."

The tears were all over her face. Nate tried to remove them all. But he couldn't. Instead he hugged her. "Don't cry Serena. Don't cry. Serena. Look at me." She looked at him. "You are right. I'm yours. I will always belong to you. Not Blair and you know that. No matter what happens i'm yours. Okay?" She nodded.

"Come here. Lay with me."And then she lay with him. She closed her eyes and promised herself to remember this moment forever.

* * *

><p>Blair and Nate. Nate and Blair. She knew it was right. But sitting next Chuck and smile, was wrong. Acting like everything was fine, was not fine. She was at a birthday. Or not a birthday, but Eleanor Waldorf's birthday. She knew Blair had chosen she should sit next to Chuck. She knew Blair still had that sick plan in her mind.<p>

"Shall we find a way to get out of here?" Chuck was whispering. She looked at him.

"Sadly, I promised Blair to be here. Otherwise i would love to go." Chuck looked at her. Followed her eyes as she looked Nate and Blair again.

"Are you sure there's not another reason why you don't wanna go? - Maybe the same reason as Natie stays here?" He mimicked her way of saying kicked his leg under the table.

**xxx**

Blair was laughing. Blair was the only one laughing. Or there were some older people laughing too. But Serena didn't. She was sitting next to Chuck. And it wasn't because she didn't enjoy sitting with Chuck. They both hated this kind of gatherings and always had a lot of fun making fun of all the others, who loved it.

"Want to dance?" She looked up. It was Nate. She nodded; she got up and took his hand. It was warm and it felt like it wouldn't ever let go again. She heard Blair laugh.

"You got the girl with the laugh." Serena whispered. She was over Nate's shoulder how Blair was trying to force Chuck to dance.

"But I didn't get the girl with the laugh i love." She blushed. She always blushed when he say something like that to her. The music got slower. She wanted to leave, but the hand didn't let go of her. She went closer to him.

"Do you still mean what you said that night?" She wasn't sure if she wanted the answer. She wasn't sure that he still meant it.

"Of course i do Serena. I will always mean that." She wanted to believe him, but she knew something had changed. "You know. This wild party is soon over." She laughed a little, mainly because she knew he loved it. "See that's the laugh i love. But i will come over tomorrow. If it's okay with you?" She just nodded.

* * *

><p>But he didn't come that next day. She was looking out of the window all day. Just waiting. Eric came up and tried to get her out, because the weather was great, but she didn't want to. Chuck called her and asked if she wanted to go a party and she wanted to, but she didn't.<p>

At the evening her phone called. It was B. "Guess what? I just told Nate that i loved him!" Serena's heart broke. She never though it would come this far.

"And you know what? He said he loved me too! Can you believe it?" Serena felt the tears in her eyes.

"No B. I honestly can't believe it. But i gotta go. Eric and Mom is done with dinner."She pressed on the red phone. She had done that before. She had felt sad before after doing that. But this time was the worst.

* * *

><p>"Honey? Eric and I are leaving over the weekend." Lily made it sound like just a little thing like usual.<p>

"Aunt Carol?" Lily nodded. Serena looked at her mom.

Serena didn't have to say anything. Lily didn't need to ask. She knew Serena didn't wanted go. "Okay. Call Eleanor if you need anything. Okay?"

Serena nodded. "I'm going to be fine mom. Just like last time".

"I know. But i'm calling Eleanor and tell her that you are alone here okay?" Lily asked. Serena just nodded. She didn't care. She never cared. Not anymore. Not since she wasn't his anymore. And since he wasn't hers anymore.

"Bye."she shouted, just before they went out of the door.

**xxx**

She ended up regretting it. At the night an awful storm started. Blair had called her, asked her is she was okay with being alone in that weather. She wasn't, but she didn't say it.

She was scared and when there was a knock on the door, she thought she was going to die. She ran down and took a pan. She opened the door. And there he was. She couldn't help it but laugh.

"Are you going to hit me with that?" he pointed at the pan. She couldn't stop laughing. "I'll take that as a yes." He smiled.

"Can i get in? It's a little ... wet out here." She let him in. Her laugh was over. She faced what had been afraid to face. She wasn't happy to see him. But she wasn't sad either.

**xxx**

"You suck at cooking, did you know that?" She looked at him. "You always have."

He smiled. "Sunshine? You suck too!" She laughed. She wasn't happy about it. She didn't want to, but she couldn't stop. She loved laughing with him or about him.

She tasted it. It did taste awful. "Hey. You got something ... right there." He touched her. Right beside her lip. She got chills and couldn't help it but to smile.

"Do you take that? And then we can go see a movie?" He smiled, with his hands all full of their bad tasting food.

"Sure Natie." She tasted the name. She didn't remember the last time she had called him that. But it felt good. Really good.

**xxx**

"How did you know anyway? That i was home alone i mean." She sat in the couch with her feet on his lap. He looked at the movie. She looked at him.

"I was with Blair. I can't believe she didn't come here. It was so obvious you were scared." She was happy. She just wanted to hug him. But it would be crossing the unwritten line - wouldn't it?

"Can you keep a secret?" He looked at her. The sound of the movie was gone. Or at least she didn't hear it.

"Sure i can Natie." She was not going to tell anyone, but was she ready to hear it?

"I'm happy Blair didn't come here. I just wanted to be with you." He was ashamed of saying it, she could see that. She hugged him.

"I'm happy too. I'm happy you came." She whispered in his ear. She looked at him. Right in to his eyes. They were saying the words, the mouth didn't say. She wanted to kiss him, she wanted to so badly. But instead she started crying.

Now he was the one hugging her. Just like that night. He kissed her hair, still hugging her. "Serena. It's okay. Remember? You're mine! And i'm yours! Just the two of us." He took her face in his hands. Looked into her blue eyes.

"Why do you keep saying that?" She asked him. It broke it. It broke everything she had believed in. But the problem was that she wasn't sure she really believed in it anymore.

"I'm sorry." He looked down as he said it.

"You shouldn't be sorry Nate!" She didn't know what to feel.

"But i'm dating Blair. It was stupid coming here." He said. Still looking down.

She got up. "How can you say that? Who can you say it was a bad thing you coming here? You know what?" She started crying again. "You keep saying you are mine! But you're not Nate! You're Blair's. You keep acting like you care about me. But you told Blair you loved her. Why don't you love me? How can you say that i'm yours, when you don't love me?"

He looked at her. He opened his mouth and closed it again. She was right. He wasn't her. She wasn't his.

"You can sleep on the couch tonight. And then you better go tomorrow. We just go back. Let's just pretend this never happened. We are just Serena and Nate again. Friends. Best friends. Brother and Sister."She turned around. Left him sitting there. Just looking at her.

* * *

><p>She couldn't sleep. The storm got worse over the night and she was scared. She couldn't go down to Nate. She wasn't sure why she couldn't go down there.<p>

She wasn't sure if it was because she was afraid of facing him after screaming at him, telling him about all these feeling. Or because she was afraid of what she was going to do, if she did it. But she went down, when the tree outside started pound on her window.

She pushed him. "Natie wake up. I'm scared. Can i sleep here ... with you?" He didn't answer her. But she lay down with him. Just like that night. She closed her eyes and remembered.

"I'm sorry. For what i said earlier. It was mean and rude and stupid. And i'm sorry. You're my Natie." She said it slowly. She was afraid.

"It's okay." He talked as slowly as her. "You're right about everything. Except one." She was about to ask what, but she didn't have to. "I care more about you than any other person. I always have and i always will."

She smiled as she fell asleep. She promised herself to remember this moment.

* * *

><p>Serena got the sunshine right into her eyes in the morning. She looked at Nate. He looked good with the sun in his hair.<p>

"Are you sleeping Natie?" he didn't answer. She punched him lightly, he didn't react. And just like that she kissed him. Just a little kiss, she rarely touched his lips. She felt happy.

In that moment she knew something that would change her life forever. She loved Nate. She loved her Natie. She closed her eyes again. She was afraid he knew. But she was even more afraid that he didn't know.

**xxx**

"Natie?" She whispered. He didn't answer. She looked up, right on the spot where she had kissed him some hours ago. He wasn't there. She looked around as she got up. Why couldn't she see him? Did he leave her? Was it just a dream?

"Morning sunshine," Nate was coming in with breakfast.

"Did you make that?" She didn't mean to be skeptical.

"Why? Don't you think it tastes good?"He laughed. He understood. She had no idea what would had happened, if she said that to Blair. But she could it to Nate. Because she loved him.

She ate the food - and she ate it fast. "It was good! How did you learn that?" She was surprised.

"Eleanor taught me. She wanted me to wake Blair up with breakfast. I though i would try on you first." He smiled.

She didn't know if she was happy or sad. She was happy because he wanted to try on her first, because he knew, she wouldn't lie to him about it, sad because he wanted to do the same for Blair.

"You should do it." She might love Nate and what he just had done for her. But she loved Blair even more and only wanted the best for her.

"Nope. Let's this be our thing. Our secret." She looked at him. And knew that secret was the wrong word for that they did right now, it was a lie. She didn't want to lie. Not to him. But most of all, not to herself.

"I kissed you." Nate, who had risen and was about to go what with the empty plates, turned around and lost the plates to they broke into splinters.

"What?"He didn't sound mad, just confused.

"I know it was wrong. I know should tell you. But i can't lie to you Nate." She wasn't sure how he was going to react.

"What were you thinking Serena?" Was it just her or did he smile?

She blushed. "You don't want to know." She though he was going to leave her, just like that. And she couldn't blame him. She was pretty sure; she would have left a long time ago. He sat down beside her. He shocked his head and laughed.

"Serena you are crazy. But you are the most amazing person i have ever known!"He said and she felt her cheeks get warm again. He smiled at that and ran his hand through her hair. And then he kissed her. She kissed back. It was over fast. But it didn't make it less amazing.

They talked the rest of the day. They didn't talk about what happened or anything important, they just talked.

* * *

><p>"It's Serena."<p>

Blair started talking at the moment she had said it. "... And then he left. I called all night and he didn't take it. I called Chuck and he hasn't heard from him. Can you believe it?" Blair was mad. It kind of annoyed Serena that Blair was mad at Nate for helping a friend. On the other hand Blair didn't know he helped a friend.

"He was with me. He knew i was scared, so he came over. He was just a good friend." She decided not to tell that they kissed it wouldn't be any good anyway.

"Oh. I told you he was a good guy didn't i?" Serena laughed. Blair laughed too. They both understood.

* * *

><p>Serena knocked on Blair's door. They were going shopping for the Sheppard wedding. She kept knocking, but no one opened. So she went in.<p>

"Blair?" She went into the living room where Blair sat and kissed Nate. "I don't want to interrupt, but we are going shopping today right? Otherwise i'm going to a party with Georgina."

Blair looked up. "Was that today? I'm done in two seconds." She ran upstairs and left Serena with Nate. She realized she hadn't been alone with him since that weekend.

"Hi Natie." She smiled.

"Sunshine." She blushed.

"Don't i get a hug?" He opened his arms and she hugged him. "I'm yours." he whispered in her ear and then he let her go.

"You're crazy" she laughed as Blair came down.

"Are you ready S?" Serena got up.

"Born ready. See you later Nate." And then they left him there looking at them as they went out.

* * *

><p>"Serena, honey? Are you soon done? We have to be there in a half hour." Lily knew that Serena wasn't ready, she just hoped.<p>

"Just leave mom, i'll be there, i promise." Lily nodded and closed the door.

Serena put on her gold dress. She loved that dress. The problem was it wasn't the dress she really wanted for the wedding. But it was too beautiful. Blair was going to look amazing in her dress, but Serena couldn't deny, she would look even better in that dress, but she didn't want to over shine Blair, and she didn't want his attention, at least not because of the dress.

**xxx**

"Can you hurry a little please?" She was going to be late. The taxi-driver said something, but she wasn't really listening. She kept looking at the clock on her phone until she was there. To minutes. She hurried out of the car - almost forgot to pay.

"Crap."She ran in to church; saw that Chuck was sitting on the last row, sat beside him and then the music started. She looked at the other rows. She could see an empty place between her mother and Blair. Blair was holding hands with Nate. She regretted that she looked at him.

"Looking for something? Or someone?" Chuck whispered. She turned around, gave him that look. "Then you don't mind ... this." he took her hand.

"Chuck?" She whispered. "Just look at the bride. She's looking beautiful."

He let go of her hand. But came closer to her. "You just stand there Chuck! Otherwise i'm going to kick you!" He grinned, but nodded slowly.

The bride was at the altar and they sat down. Chuck fell asleep under the wedding ceremony. Serena kept herself awake, so she could kick Chuck, when it was over.

"Chuck? Chuck! Wake up!" She hit him, maybe a little too hard.

"What?" She smiled to him, she was happy that she could teach him a little.

"We have to get up." She literally dragged him up.

The bride and bridegroom went out. Her mother came and looked at her with that look.

Then Blair and Nate came. Hand in Hand. Blair smiled to her. Serena knew that Blair thought that she and Chuck were together. She looked at Nate. He smiled to her, she looked down. He probably thought the same was Blair. And she wasn't sure if he was happy about it.

* * *

><p>"She looked amazing. Don't you think S? I really wanna look like that to my wedding. Or maybe even better. What about you S?" Blair was talking and talking. It was actually nice. Serena loved when Blair talked.<p>

She couldn't help it but smile. Chuck looked at her with a smirk. She kicked him under the table.

Serena looked at Nate. She was happy it just was the four of them. She knew that they was placed far away from everyone else, because they always did something stupid. But they couldn't help it. That was who they were.

"Are you talking notes?" Serena whispered to Nate. He laughed.

"I think i have to." Serena laughed with him, glad nothing had really changed.

"Champagne?" a waiter came with glasses. Serena looked around, just to see that no one was looking. "Yes thank you. For all four of us." The waiter put down four glasses.

"Are you guys ready to freak out?" Nate took a glass and gave one to Chuck. At the same time Serena took a glass and gave the last glass to Blair.

"Cheers!" They said as loud as they could without anyone noticing. The glasses clinked.

* * *

><p>"Come on!" Serena was laughing.<p>

"Serena you're drunk!" Blair looked blaming on her. "And so are you guys!"

Chuck got up. Nate followed him. "Come on B! It's going to be fun!" Serena smiled to Blair as Chuck and Nate came over to her.

Blair got up from the chair. "Only to look after you three."Serena laughed as she hugged Blair.

"This way!" She took Nate's hand, she was maybe a little drunk, but she couldn't help it but shake a little. She showed the way to bar. "It's in here!" She opened the door. It was a big room, with a big bar.

"We're going to have so much fun!" She giggled.

Chuck went behind the bar. A big grin came across his face. "Yes we are!"

* * *

><p>She wasn't sure when or why, but Blair left. Chuck left a little after with the message that he had another party to attend to – or maybe he was going to find a random girl, she wasn't sure.<p>

So there she was. All alone with the guy she loved. She didn't know why he didn't leave with Blair. But he didn't and she was happy about it.

She found champagne in the bar. She walked around on the bar talking about nothing. Nate sat on a chair. She laughed. He laughed. She sat on the bar.

The cork flied of, they laughed. "That never happens to me!" He joked. She loved it.

"That's okay. You're still a man in my eyes." She moved from the bar to his lap.

"Serena." He said with a warning in his voice, but he didn't stop her. She kissed him. He kissed back. She couldn't help it. He couldn't help. She kissed him again more passionate this time.

* * *

><p>She was with Nate in a way she never thought she was going to be with him.<p>

She woke up with Nate by her site. She felt guilty because of Blair. But she couldn't help it. She loved Nate. It was wrong. She had to leave. She started crying.

She remembered everything; she remembered; every time he had hugged her, because she had cried. She remembered everything he had done for her. She kissed him softly. "I'm so sorry Natie. But remember..." She cried "... i'm yours and you're mine! That's a thing that will never change."

Then she got up, wiped away her tears. She ran out and got a taxi. She ran away, just like she always did. The problem was that she used to run to him. But now she just ran. She just wanted to forget everything.

She closed her eyes and tried to forget - but she couldn't.

**A/N hope you like. Review if you like so (;**


	2. Nate's pov

**A/N Nate's part. i kinda like it actually. some of it at least.**

It was her birthday. He was supposed to hide in the kitchen. Or not hide; because she wasn't suppose to look for him. He was supposed to come, when Lily had told her that he was there. He heard footsteps on the stairs. He went out, slowly.

"Natiiiie!" Serena ran to him, hugged him so hard that he could hardly breathe. He loved it when she called him Natie.

He looked at her. "You know what? I'm going to live here until my parents get home!" He had been so happy, when his mother had told him, he loved being with Serena. Serena screamed of happiness. She kissed him on his nose – he almost blushed. She took his hand – he didn't want to let go ever again.

"You going to sleep in my room, and then it's going be like we are married!" Nate looked at her, did she really say that?

"Are you going to marry me?" Serena smiled.

"Yes Natie!" Nate blushed and hugged her.

* * *

><p>He had been on his first date with Blair. He lay in his bed. Smirking. It was a bad habit he got from Chuck. It had been good, really good actually. Though Blair scared him a little. She didn't say it out loud, but she had the idea that they were getting married someday. He didn't tell her that he already knew who he was going to marry and it wasn't Blair.<p>

He stared out of the window. He didn't smirk anymore. He was bored. He knew who he really wanted to be with. A blonde beautiful girl. But he couldn't call could he?

As he thought of it his phone rang. "It's Nate. Hallo? Anyone there?" She didn't say anything. He smiled. She didn't want to hurt Blair. He knew that.

"I'm coming over S." He smiled. Not smirking, but smiling. He was going to be with her. He couldn't say it. But he loved her. He really did.

* * *

><p>"Did you know i love your laugh?" He couldn't hold it anymore. It was the middle of the movie. They had seen it a million times, but they watched it like first time every time. He noticed that she blushed. He knew that she had grown from blushing, or at least he thought so.<p>

"No i didn't." He could see that she wanted to say some more, so he let her. "Did you know i love everything about you?" She looked at him. He just looked back. He didn't know what to say. She continued: "Did you know i just wished this moment would stay forever?" From one moment to the other she started crying. "I just want to be with you forever. No Blair. No Mom and Dad. No school. No problems at all. Just you and me. 'Cause you know what Natie? You are mine. And i'm yours."

He wanted to kiss her and tell her that it was true. The honest truth. Because he was hers. And now he knew she always was his.

The tears were all over her face. He tried to remove them all. But he couldn't. Instead he hugged her. "Don't cry Serena. Don't cry. Serena. Look at Me." She looked at him. "You are right. I'm yours. I will always belong to you. Not Blair and you know that. No matter what happens i'm yours. Okay?" She nodded.

"Come here. Lay with me." He wasn't sure how she would react. She lay with him. He smiled. She was really amazing. He could hear and feel she was falling asleep. He fell asleep with a huge smirk on his face.

* * *

><p>Blair and Nate. Nate and Blair. It was right wasn't it? He knew it was. But sitting in front of Serena – and Chuck – and smile like this was the best time of his wasn't. He knew that she put on the smile for Blair. She loved Blair.<p>

He knew that Blair got this sick idea with Serena and Chuck. He couldn't see it. How could Serena, the most amazing girl he had ever known, end up with Chuck? He hadn't told Blair he thought that. Mainly because Blair hadn't told him her idea of having them together.

They whispered. He hated when they did that. And lately they actually had been whispering a lot. Not that he was supposed to notice. Blair was talking to him and he tried to look as interested as possible. She was looking at them. Chuck whispered. Blair asked him about something, he just nodded. All the sudden Chuck sat back on the chair, not looking happy at all.

**xxx**

He got a little tired of it. Her laugh. He liked her. Of course he did. And the laugh was cute – like really really cute. But he knew she was only laughing because she had a little too much to drink and tried to impress the old and important people at Eleanor's birthday, because she always tried to.

Serena and Chuck had been talking through the whole thing. They seemed to get along – all of the sudden. Not that he minded. It was good for her that she didn't only have himself and Blair. But that the other person was Chuck, maybe wasn't such a good idea.

He walked over to her. "Want to dance?" She looked up. She looked at him and he saw how beautiful she looked that day. She nodded and rose. She took his hand. He didn't want to let go of it. And for some reason it looked like she understood.

Blair was laughing behind him. "You got the girl with the laugh." Serena was whispered. He smirked.

"I didn't get the girl with the laugh i love."She blushed. He loved when she blushed. It looked good at her. Maybe he only thought that, because he never had seen her blush with other than himself.

The music got slower. She wanted to leave, he knew that. But he wouldn't let go of her. She went closer to him.

"Do you still mean what you said that night?" He had to keep himself from laughing. How could she think he didn't mean that anymore? He could see in her face that she wasn't sure anymore.

"Of course i do Serena. I will always mean that." She looked thoughtful. "You wild party is soon over." She laughs a little, he smiled, god he loved that laugh.

"See that's the laugh i love. But i will come over tomorrow. If it's okay with you?" She just nodded. He hoped she would say something, but she didn't.

* * *

><p>He heard the doorbell. He was about to leave to Serena. But outside the door Blair stood. More beautiful than he had ever seen her.<p>

"I thought we might could go on a little picnic?" She smiled to him. What could he say? No sorry Blair I can't, I was just about to leave to your best friend to stay there all day. Maybe tomorrow? He knew he couldn't. He wished in that moment he was Chuck. Chuck wouldn't have cared about it and just left.

"Actually Blair. It's not good right now." He knew it wouldn't work, but he missed his alone time with Serena. He made a note to himself saying he should never say that to anyone – especially Chuck.

"I'm sure it can wait." Blair started. His battle was lost. He took his jacked and they left – hand in hand.

* * *

><p>"Nate." He told himself. "How – can – you – be – so – stupid?" He bumped his head into the wall for every word.<p>

He threw himself at the bed. Blair had told him she loved him. He – as the boy he was – had panicked and said he loved her back. It wasn't like he didn't like or care about her. He really did. But he didn't love her. Or maybe he did? He had never felt love before had he? Yes he had. He had loved Serena when they were kids – he was almost sure about that. On the other hand. What was love when you were four?

* * *

><p>He felt really bad about himself. He was sitting at the Waldorf, listening to how bad Serena had gotten over the last few weeks. Of course she had partied a lot. But apparently it had gotten worse. She didn't leave her room. Something – he thought to himself, someone – had broken her down.<p>

Blair told that when she had called Serena the night when Nate had told her he loved her – she made it sound like it was him that said it first, which was completely untrue – she had sounded strange and far away.

Now – while they were sitting there – she was home alone. The weather was awful. But he knew that Serena wouldn't call for help.

"Maybe you should call Serena?" He said to Blair. She nodded.

Serena was scared. But she said she was fine. Apparently Blair only called her because he told her to, because she didn't seem like she cared that much. He made a fast decision and got up.

"Goodnight." He said and left. He thought he heard Blair shout after him, but he had more important thing to do.

He knocked on the door. He was wet. Minutes – or what felt like it – later she finally opened the door. With a pan in the hand. She started laughing. He smiled.

"Are you going to hit me with that?" he pointed at the pan. She couldn't stop laughing. "I'll take that as a yes." He smiled.

"Can i get in? It's a little... wet out here." She let him in. Her laugh was over. He didn't like the mood it made on both of them. He wanted to hug her. She probably wanted to kick him with the pan.

**xxx**

"You suck cooking, did you know that?" She looked at him. "You always have."

He smiled. "Sunshine? You suck too!" She laughed. It felt good being relaxed. Even though he knew she wasn't happy that she liked being happy.

She tasted it on the food. He smiled."Hey. You got something... right there." He touched her. Right there beside her lip. He almost got chills and he couldn't help it but smile. Being around Serena always got him in another mood than when he was with Blair, much more light and smiling.

"Do you take that? And then we can go see a movie?" He smiled, with his hands all full of their bad tasting food.

"Sure Natie." He almost jumped of happiness. He didn't remember the last time she had called him that. But it felt good. Really good.

**xxx**

"How did you know anyway? That i was home alone i mean." She sat in the couch with her feet on his lap. He tried to look at the movie. She looked at him.

"I was with Blair. I can't believe she didn't come here. It was so obvious you were scared." She was happy, he could see that. He wanted to hug her. But he couldn't. Could he?

"Can you keep a secret?" He looked at her. The sound of the movie was gone. Or at least he didn't hear it.

"Sure i can Natie." He knew she wasn't going to tell anyone. He trusted her.

"I'm happy Blair didn't come here. I just wanted to be with you." He was ashamed of saying it, he wasn't sure why, it wasn't because he never thought of doing it, but doing it apparently was different. She hugged him.

"I'm happy too. I'm happy you came." She whispered in his ear. She looked at him. Right in to his eyes. He looked at hers. They were saying the words, the mouth didn't say. He wanted to kiss her, he wanted to so badly. And then she started crying.

Now he was the one hugging her. Just like that night. He kissed her hair, still hugging her. "Serena. It's okay. Remember? You're mine! And I'm yours! Just the two of us." He took her face in his hands. Looked into her blue eyes.

"Why do you keep saying that?" She asked him. He felt like the world broke. She said what he had been thinking for months now. But he did mean it – didn't he?

"I'm sorry" He looked down as he said it.

"You shouldn't be sorry Nate!" He felt like she was screaming – maybe she was.

"But I'm dating Blair. It was stupid coming here." He said. Still looking down. He didn't want to face her eyes, because he knew she could see the lie in his. He didn't regret coming here at all.

She got up. "How can you say that? How can you say it was a bad thing you coming here? You know what?" She started crying again. _"_You keep saying you are mine! But you're not Nate! You're Blair's. You keep acting like you care about me. But you told Blair you love her. Why don't you love me? How can you say that I'm yours, when you don't love me?"

He looked at her. He didn't know what to say. He opened his mouth and closed it again. She was right. He wasn't her. She wasn't his. The pain that came realizing that was awful

"You can sleep on the couch tonight. And then you better go tomorrow. We just go back. Let's just pretend this never happened. We are just Serena and Nate again. Friends. Bestfriends. Brother and Sister." She turned around. Left him sitting there. He wanted to scream after her. But he didn't, he just looked at her.

**xxx**

Something pushed him, not hard, but enough to wake him a little up. "Natie wake up. I'm scared. Can't i sleep here... with you?" He didn't answer her. He didn't know what to say. But she lay down with him. Just like that night. It felt good.

"I'm sorry. For what I said earlier. It was mean and rude and stupid. And i'm sorry. You're my Natie." She said it slowly. She was afraid.

"It's okay." He talked as slowly as her. "You're right about everything. Except one." He wasn't sure if he should say it. But decided that he should. "I care more about you than any other person. I always have and i always will." He smiled when he said it. She went a little closer to him – didn't she?

**xxx**

"Are you sleeping Natie?" Her voice was far away, he wasn't sure if he was dreaming. She punched him – didn't she? Then she kissed him. Just a little kiss, she barely touched his lips. He wasn't sure if he was dreaming. But it filled him with happiness.

* * *

><p>He woke up early. Serena was sleeping. She looked beautiful with sun in her hair. He wanted to surprise her. A really good morning surprise.<p>

He got up and after making sure she was still asleep, he went to the kitchen. He remembered everything Eleanor told him about the breakfast. He sucked at cooking – he knew that, but he really wanted to make this work.

"Natie?" He heard her whisper. It was his call. He took a tray and put on the breakfast.

"Morning sunshine," he said as he walked in.

"Did you make that?" She sounded really skeptical. But he knew she didn't mean too.

"Why? Don't you think it taste good?" He laughed. They both understood. Neither of them could cook. It would be a surprise if it tasted good.

She ate the food - and she ate it fast. "It was good! How did you learn that?" She was surprised.

"Eleanor taught me. She wanted me to wake Blair up with breakfast. I though i would try on you first." He smiled. In that moment he realized he shouldn't have told her about Blair.

"You should do it." She said after a moment with silence.

"Nope. Let's this be our thing. Our secret." She looked at him. Was it pain in her eyes?

"I kissed you." He had risen and was about to go what with the empty plates, turned around and lost the plates to they broke into splinters.

"What?" He wasn't mad or anything. Just confused. It hadn't been a dream after all.

"I know it was wrong. I know should tell you. But i can't lie to you Nate." He didn't know what to do.

"What were you thinking Serena?" He couldn't help but smile a little.

She blushed. "You don't want to know." He sat down beside her. He shocked his head and laughed.

"Serena you are crazy. But you are the most amazing person i have ever known!" He said and he saw she started to blush again. He smiled at that and ran his hand through her hair. And then he kissed her. She kissed back. It was over fast. But it didn't make it less amazing.

They talked the rest of the day. They didn't talk about what happened or anything important, they just talked.

* * *

><p>"So?" Chuck said. Nate raised his eyebrow.<p>

"What?" He knew what Chuck was going to say. He had an awful idea that Chuck knew – everything. And he has right. Chuck smirked.

"You slept at Serena's place." Chuck enjoyed this. Nate smirked.

"And what if I did?" He was happy that he never blushed, and when he did, he didn't blush that much, because at this moment he would probably blush. He had slept at his girlfriend's best friends place. Not that it was that wrong. But Chuck knew he had a thing for Serena – and Nate knew he loved her – and they had slept on the couch – together.

"Are you going to tell Blair?"Chuck smirked.

"I'm guessing Serena already did."He said. Not thinking more about it.

* * *

><p>He kissed Blair. She kissed back. He heard at knock on the door, but since Blair didn't do anything, he didn't care.<p>

"Blair?" Serena was standing in front of them – with something that could look like a little Chuck smirk – they were too much together. "I don't want to interrupt, but we are going shopping today right? Otherwise i'm going to a party with Georgina."

Blair looked up. "Was that today? I'm done in two seconds." She ran upstairs and left Nate with Serena. He realized he hadn't been alone with her since that weekend.

"Hi Natie." She smiled.

"Sunshine." She blushed. "Don't I get a hug?" He opened his arms, it was actually meant for a joke, but she hugged him. "I'm yours." he whispered in her ear and then he let her go.

"You're crazy," she laughed as Blair came down. He wanted to nod; yes he was crazy, crazy about her.

"Are you ready S?" Serena got up.

"Born ready. See you later Nate." He looked after them, or more her, he had forgot how amazing she was, her smile, her laugh which he loved so much. He was out of his mind.

* * *

><p>He sad with his mother on his right side. On his left side was Blair, she was holding his hands. Beside Blair was there an empty place, Lily was mad at Serena for not showing up at the right time. But he knew – unlike Blair – that Lily never had expected Serena to be there at the right time. Because she never was.<p>

He heard the door open behind him. But didn't look, Blair would kill him, if he did. The music started and everyone rose. As the bride came in – she looked beautiful – he looked around, to see if Serena had arrived. She had. She was sitting – standing – in the back with no one else than Chuck. She looked gorgeous in the gold dress, more beautiful than Blair. He was jealous that Chuck was standing with Serena.

She kicked Chuck when the wedding ceremony was over. He didn't know if he wanted to laugh or kick Chuck too. Blair gave Serena a look that said everything; Blair thought Serena and Chuck finally got together, he wasn't sure if he thought so too.

**xxx**

"She looked amazing. Don't you think S? I really wanna look like that to my wedding. Or maybe even better. What about you S?" Blair was talking and talking. He wasn't sure if it was good or not, he was happy that he didn't have to talk himself, but he would like her to be a little quite.

Nate looked at Serena. He was happy it just was the four of them. He knew that they were placed far away from everyone else, because they always did something stupid. But they couldn't help it. That was who they were.

"Are you taking notes?" Serena whispered to him.

He laughed. "I think i have to." Serena laughed - he would never get tired of it.

"Champagne?" a waiter came with glasses. Serena looked around, just to see that no one was looking.

"Yes thank you. For all four of us." The waiter put down four glasses.

"Are you guys ready to freak out?" Nate took a glass and gave one to Chuck. At the same time Serena took a glass and gave the last glass to Blair.

"Cheers!" They said as loud as they could without anyone noticing. The glasses clinked.

**xxx**

"Come on!" Serena was laughing.

"Serena you're drunk!" Blair looked blaming on her. "So are you guys!"

Chuck got up. Nate followed him. "Come on B! It's going to be fun!" Serena smiled to Blair as Chuck and Nate came over to her.

Blair got up from the chair. "Only to look after you three." Serena laughed as she hugged Blair.

"This way!" She took his hand; he was happy, he felt like he flew as she showed the way to bar. "It's in here!" She opened the door. It was a big room, with a big bar.

"We're going to have so much fun!" She giggled.

Chuck went behind the bar. A big grin came across his face. "Yes we are!"

* * *

><p>He wasn't sure how or why, but Blair left. Chuck left a little after with the message,that he had another party to attend to – or maybe he was going to find a random girl, he wasn't sure, maybe both.<p>

So there he was. All alone with the girl she loved. He didn't know why he didn't leave with Blair. But he was happy that he didn't.

Serena found champagne in the bar. She walked around on the bar talking about nothing. He sat on a chair. She laughed. He laughed. She sat on the bar.

The cork flied of, they laughed. "That never happens to me!" He joked. She laughed. He loved it.

"That's okay. You're still a man in my eyes." She moved from the bar to his lap.

"Serena."He said with a warning in his voice, but he didn't stop her. She kissed him. He kissed back. He couldn't help. She couldn't help it. She kissed him, again more passionate this time.

He was with Serena in a way, he never thought, he was going to be with her.

* * *

><p>When he woke she was gone. He didn't even now what to do. The love of his life had left him after they had been together, in a way he had never been with anyone before. She, he girl he loved, took his virginity and left.<p>

Serena had left for boarding school, out of the blue. She hadn't said goodbye to anyone – not even him. It was right after the wedding. Nobody knew why, not even Lily, but she never said that.

He knew it was because she didn't love him back. She might like him a little, but she loved Blair and she didn't want to hurt her. She left because of him. Because she had been with her best friends boyfriend. Her best friend loved her boyfriend, but she didn't.

He wished he could just forget about her and move on, hand in hand with Blair, the girl that wanted him. But he never did, she was always there.


End file.
